Do You Suffer from a Fear of Abandonment?

By Denise Humphrey, Ph.D., www.DeniseHumphrey.com

Many people — men, women and children — suffer from a fear of abandonment. While the basis of abandonment fears is usually set in childhood, abandonment issues often do not manifest until adulthood. People who suffer from fear of abandonment may be unaware that this fear, which is deeply rooted in the psyche, sets the stage for behaviors that may be self-destructive and counterproductive to achieving a sense of emotional security. Therapy can be tremendously beneficial in overcoming abandonment fears.

Symptoms of Abandonment Fear

• Emotional Neediness. People who suffer from a fear of abandonment often feel excessively needy in relationships. This emotional neediness can lead to unhealthy relationships and often leads to the person’s worst fear — driving away the person he or she is clinging to.
• Panic. People who suffer from a fear of abandonment often panic over small details concerning the person with whom they are in a relationship. He or she may call or text obsessively, panic if a phone call is not returned immediately or even threaten to harm him or her self in an attempt to gain attention.
• Complacency. Someone who suffers from abandonment fears may become complacent in an attempt to prevent his or her significant other from leaving — or abandoning him/her. This could mean taking on chores, activities (even sexual activities) the person does not prefer in an attempt to gain favor with the other person.
• Perpetually Breaking Up. Someone suffering from an abandonment complex may have a pattern of constantly ending relationships. This person may preemptively break up in an effort “to do the rejecting” first.
• Lack of Self-Worth. Individuals who suffer from a fear of abandonment may feel as though they are not worthy of love. Their weakened sense of self-worth can become a self-fulfilling prophesy in that their lack of self-love makes it difficult for them to attract love creating a vicious cycle.

Overcoming abandonment fears is not easy, but it is possible. The individual must be willing to diligently work towards recovery and be willing to establish new boundaries within his or her relationships. Working with a professional therapist with specific training in abandonment issues is a significant step to recovery.

Denise Humphrey, Ph.D
Schedule an appointment with Dr. Humphrey today! 972-239-2490

CREDENTIALS
•    Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology:  Fielding Graduate University
•    Master of Music in Piano Performance:  University of Notre Dame
•    Bachelor of Music in Piano Performance:  Southern Methodist University
•    License No. and State: 32345 Texas
•    Board of Trustees, Dallas Foundation for Psychoanalysis
•    Chair, Arts Committee for the Dallas Society for Psychoanalytic Psychology
•    Member, National Register of Health Service Providers in Psychology

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